It’s almost the new year! Ho Ho Holy crap. Does that mean I’m supposed to reassess and all? Do some reflection and make resolutions? I’m Jewish, I did my reflecting back during Yom Kippur. I don’t want to do it again. Wine, wine! No that isn’t a typo. I’m not bitching, if I’m going to do this, I need some wine.
Okay, now that my cup runneth over, here are 5 things I hope to accomplish in the New Year.
One – Just say no. As in, No kid, get your own milk. No, PTA mom, I will not bake 100 cupcakes and stuff envelopes for you. No, mom, I’m not getting my kid a haircut. No, dad, I don’t feel like picking up the phone. No, children, I’m not making each of you a different dinner. Yes! That felt good. I mean, No! That felt good. Also, as much as it pains me, I must include, No, self, you don’t need that second bowl of ice cream, which means you certainly don’t need the third.
To be in complete ying/yang balance, number two is – Just say Yes. As in, Yes, I’d like a massage. Yes, I’d like another scoop. (Oh wait, conflict with number one here. I know! I’ll just fit that extra scoop in my first bowl. Problem solved.) Yes, I am going out with the girls tonight. And yes, husband, you are going to love me up. Yes, Yes and more yes please.
Three – Eat some Shutthefuckupcakes… I stole this from Momaical. She recommended giving them out to a number of ‘challenging’ people around the holidays, but I’m going to eat them myself; because frankly, sometimes I just don’t know when to STFU. I tell myself, don’t do it. Hold it in, but off I go. My tongue has a mind of its own. There are also times, when I just want my brain to STFU, so I might try them for that as well. Let me know if you need the recipe.
STFUcakes wouldn’t be the same (or as necessary) without…wine! Resolution number 4 – Drink more. Yes, I need to just sit back, relax, unwind and enjoy a glass of wine. Or two. I’m doing it right now, and I’m thinking, Yeth! This is the beth post I wrotein thoooooooo looooong! I love dis one. I love you too. I’m feeling all teary. I need a moment.
Number five – Do more things for other people. It almost seems impossible because all I do is things for other people, like schlepping, laundry and errands, volunteering at the schools, cooking and catering; but I’m taking about things I don’t resent, uh, I mean, things that aren’t in my normal day to day. Like, bringing a cup of coffee to the Verizon man outside, or buying flowers for the checkout girl, or visiting an older person in the neighborhood. It’s not really for them, it’s for me. Every time, I remember to do that kind of stuff, it makes me happier than the person I’ve done it for. Especially when I bring someone those STFUcakes, and they really could use them. Nothing like helping out those in need.
That’s my list, and I’m sticking to it. Well, hopefully. I’m taking it one day at a time. They’re resolutions, not promises. No pressure here.
Happy almost New Year Everyone! May it be full of sweetness and love.