“Mommy! Get that ball!” My five-year old calls out as I’m walking out the door, holding a coffee in one hand, a water bottle under my arm, my 40 pound pocketbook over my shoulder, two camp knapsacks over the other arm, and a bag of dirty clothes for the dry cleaner.
A wrapped granola bar for my oldest dangles from my mouth. “Oh yeah,” I mutter, through gritted teeth. “Let me get that for you.”
“What?” He jumps in front of me. “What?”
“Get the ball, mommy!” My 11 year-old calls out, leaning on his wiffle bat.
I’m struggling with the keys, trying to press the button that automatically opens my mini-van door and not drop my coffee, or I’d freak on them.
“Mommy? Can you get the ball?” He asks again. Seriously, does he not have eyes? Or legs?
Only my 8 year-old has the ability to see outside of himself.
“Can I help you? He asks. “I can take my bag.”
I try to smile with my eyes, the only unencumbered part of my body, but I keep moving. Any disruption would cause everything to drop faster than a pair of old boobs on new twins.
I make it to the car and dump everything onto the seat, except my coffee, which I gently place in its holder.
Whew. 8am and I’m already done, but of course, it’s just beginning. I need to drive the oldest to baseball camp, the middle to day camp and the youngest… Damn, the youngest has no camp.
“Mommy! You didn’t get the ball!” My 5 year-old accuses, which I ignore.
“Get in the car, please.”
They pile in and once settled, I run to retrieve the wiffle ball and toss it on the lawn. We’re ready.
First stop! Camp for Boy 1 in next town.
Second stop! Camp for Boy 2 in town next to next town.
Then me and Boy 3 drop the dry cleaning, stop at the supermarket and head home to play legos,haveacatch,drawpictures,watchshowwhileidoelliptical&eatlunch.
Pick-up time!
First stop! Boy 1.
Second stop! Boy 2.
Third stop. Train station in totally different town to pick up daddy.
We get there in about 20 minutes, but have almost an hour before the train. My middle has a game tonight so he changes into his uniform in the back while they eat the snacks I packed and watch episodes of the Brady Bunch on the minivan TV. All hail the minivan TV.
This is our down time. Hope you’re enjoying it. Want a cheese stick?
Once husband/coach is in the car, we head straight for the field.
Throw. Catch. Pitch. Strike. Run. We win. Yay! Or, we lose. Boo!
Either way, we head home.
Once inside, I collect their dirty clothes and send their dirty bodies to the shower.
“Look, Mama,” My 5 year-old says over and over, and every time I do, he’s in a different naked position displaying himself.
Balls. Balls. Balls.
I hear my husband click on the TV, and the room fills with baseball.
No way he’s going to score tonight.
Catching Z’s
Icescreammama 
First of all…there are minivans with TV?!?!? Now I’m feeling upset because our minivan has no tv. I’d also be worried about my own future as a mother of three, but my youngest is a girl so we don’t have to worry about her playing with balls. Oh, wait…
You sound very efficient and you have great time management, wanna borrow my kid? 😀
why thank you. and sure, what’s one more in the van. 🙂
Could be worse I guess. The boys could all be into hockey. That’s a lot more equipment and earlier mornings.
you said it! baseball is smooth sailing compared to the rink. never!
You lay out the day in the life of a mom perfectly!!!! I love when I am holding everything and the kitchen sink and one of my darlings will ask me to get something for them!! Aaah!!! (Love this piece!!)
i am totally doing their future wives a disservice.
Oh my god, I’m exhausted reading this. And I want to link to it on Friday for my obsession with schedules and fitting it all in. You’re kind of a master.
ha! it has been a schlepp of a summer. i guess if this is what i’m the master of, it’s better than nothing. 😉
I concur – I’m exhausted. Children seem like a lot of work.
oh man! they are!!
Great post! Although, I feel bad for thinking how tired I am right now…
ha! you’re allowed. you were up late fighting zombies.. or something like that.
You captured the exhaustion & craziness so well. How do we do this everyday? Love the line about dropping faster than old boobs on new twins 🙂
Mamarific—that was my favorite line as well. Fantastic imagery!!
thank you! 🙂
Balls, balls, balls. Ha! You definitely captured that harriedness of this time period in life. I’m tired just reading it, maybe because I just did it. Whew.
Whenever I read one of these I am so grateful for the aging of my kid as well as myself…Unfortunately I cant vouch for maturing…of either of us…
ha! i thought with my kids being a little older that this would be my smooth sailing summer – ha! totally drowning over here! maybe next year. Hahah
yeah when I said older I meant married and giving me grandchildren older…not 6th grade older….
haha!!
Absolutely hilarious!
thanks. 🙂
And with the arrival of the little prince… something for me to “look forward to” in a few years time. Heck, he already likes being naked more than anything else…
I can sooo see you trying to balance everything…I would have just screamed and dropped everything and made them carry their own shit – and yeah, he should not score – who says he can watch baseball?
it’s quite the balancing act, getting everything to the car in one trip. almost a challenge. 😉
and he’s freaking watching it right now!
Mr. Big’s baseball is Call of the Wildman or River Monsters so I feel you there
Wow. that sounds hard core
Love the description of carrying a zillion things! I know it so well (and I only have two)!
it’s the worst when it all falls down!! haha! i’ve had that happen, especially after the supermarket. i don’t know why i feel the need to carry everything all in one trip!!
Seriously, you deserve a medal. I feel like I need a nap just from reading this.
ha! i don’t know about a medal, but i’ll take an ice cream cone and a thanks, mom. 🙂
So many balls, so little time. Perfect ending and gawwwwlllllleeee you are superwoman. You deserve more ice cream, all the time.
there are so many balls in my house! haha!
Balls.Balls.Balls. made me laugh.
I hope you have a restful evening.
almost as funny as bedazzled vjayjays. 😉
Yeah, apparently I’m a 12-year old boy on the inside. I love all fart-related topics as well.
Oh just… BALLS. Fantastic post, hon!! 🙂
ha! thank you! 🙂
Please tell me you didn’t have to do it all again the next day? Who are we kidding? I know you did, so I hope you at least got uninterrupted night of sleep!
EVERY DAY!! but yes, my kids sleep through the night. whooo!
Balls. Balls. Balls. Story of my life.
same life, apparently. crazy, but can’t really complain. 😉
This is such a perfect post. I love that it comes back to balls, balls, balls in the end. Well done. Like everyone has said above–I’m tired just reading it. Way to go, mom, for living it out.
thank you! those balls are hard to juggle! 😉
Balls, balls, balls, alright! I love the pic of you at the end and that your husband didn’t score that night. Makes me feel better to know my hubs isn’t alone. 😉
ha!! sometimes i’m overwhelmed with all the balls! 😉
THIS IS MY LIFE. Substitute taekwondo for baseball and toss in a full time job. I am not fulfilled. I want to run away. Sometimes I let them eat cheez doodles for breakfast. Yes, I know the food coloring is banned in Europe. Suck it, Europeans.
oh we did tae knon do for years! my 8 year old stopped this past january as a brown belt. so you can throw some boards in there as well. and i’m not one to throw breakfast judgments around. pass the puffs.
Now I’m tired. NOBODY would be getting lucky after that kind of day!
you get used to it. it’s most days. 🙂
Hold on a second . . . how did you get into my house, and how did I not see you watching me throughout my day? I at least want royalties if you get any money for writing my biography. Oh, who am I kidding? Nobody would pay to read about my crazy days! I am surrounded by balls at all times. Sigh.
there’s a lot of us out there!!
Absolutely brilliant. Amazeballs, in fact!
Love this: “I try to smile with my eyes, the only unencumbered part of my body”
ha! i love amazeballs!! thank you!
I swear I spend 3/4 of my day with a kid or kid stuff in my arms… No balls right now, but school has started, wa-hoo!
man! mine doesn’t start for a month!
my second job starts the minute i pick up 3 kids from 2 different schools and do the drop offs/homework/dinner/bath/bed routines.. I get this.
right??! i think we should start a support group! 😉
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Someone just said what are you laughing at Baz…!
Too funny! 😉
ha! freaking balls! 😉
Ya just have to be a bloke to understand 😉
well, i’m surrounded by them. 😉
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