This year I didn’t make any resolutions. Frankly I didn’t need the pressure, and really I’m working every day on improvement – okay, most days – okay, days where the stars align, the kids do as I say, there’s plenty of ice cream and it’s sunny out. What?! It happens.
I would however like my children to make some changes that would improve my life much more than any resolution I could possibly make for myself. Boys, are you listening? BOYS! Sigh. Well, that brings me to their first resolution…
Listen up! Why do I have to say, “I put your clothes in your room” for you to come up to me not five minutes later and innocently ask, “Where are my clothes?” And how many times do I have to rip devices from hands, snap close books or shut off shows? Just take a second, look my way and say, “Okay mom, got it.” And seriously do I have to ask you to do the recyclables five times? Five! Why?Why?Why?Why?Why? Annoying, isn’t it?
Give me a minute. Okay, seriously, stop counting to 60. I really mean let me finish what I’m doing no matter how long it takes, a minute or a half hour. Like right now, extremely persistent 7 year-old who absolutely must play a game with me right this very second. Kid, please, we just played cards and Mario and I got you a snack and had a serious conversation about how you were going to set up your Legos, but now you need to just give me a minute.
Time for bed. When I’m done for the day, I am truly done. I’m not kidding. I don’t want any more requests for snacks, drinks, one more show or let’s have a heart to heart about which animal is truly your favorite. I want bed. I want it for you. I want it for me. I want it now. So go the fudgecakes to sleep.
Trust yourself. It can be the hardest thing to do, especially with a bunch of peer eyes staring you down, pressuring you into submission. But you’re good and smart and you know what’s right, so listen to yourself. I promise you’ll make plenty of mistakes on your own. There’s no need to make your friend’s mistakes as well. Trust me.
Just Stop. “Mom! He did this! Mom! He did it first! Mom! He’s bothering me!…” Guys, I don’t know how to express, first, how annoying you annoying each other can be for me and second, how the brothers you’re going out of your way to torture are really and truly your best friends in this life. No one will have your back like they will. No one will know you like they will. No one will really be there for you like they will. So give each other a break (not the arm kind), and throw each other a kind word instead of under the bus.
And just to cover my bases, please also resolve to never drink and drive, sky dive, move to another country, marry someone I don’t like or join the circus. And even though I intend to never make resolutions again, I now plan to make a list for you guys every year. It’s my last resolution!
Luckily, you know how well I do with those.
*Hey, if you have a moment, please give a quick click and check out my first essay up on Mamalode called Surviving the Supermarket. If I were to make any resolution it would be to never take all three of my boys with me to the supermarket ever again.
I always hit a wall around 7 pm when I announce that “mom is closed for business, no more requests!” Just last night I was standing next to my kids’ beds and said, “You know what would be easier? If I just stood here all night so I could constantly bring you guys drinks/snacks/read books/sing songs/rub backs etc etc etc.” to which my daughter replied, “YEAH! DO THAT MOM!”
I’m usually good till 8, then I a knot of sighing and snarky retorts all while making snacks and asking them to finish things up for the millionth time. This would never happen in the 70s!
God, Right? I want this to be for my kids too. Except they can’t count to sixty so they just stomp their feet and spit at me until I give them my attention.
It ain’t easy girlfriend.
I think I love you more after this post💓
Well I can’t argue love! Thanks for the smile! 🙂
I tell my two to just stop at least once a day. They’re 19 and 23, the 23 year old just moved back home after a year on his own and still his favorite pastime is aggravating his brother.
I’ve also informed them both they are not allowed to marry witches like my one cousin did.
Isn’t that ridiculous?! Hahaha! I guess it never ends! 🙂
Happy New Year to you and your family. Its always great to hear from you. May you have a blessed and prosperous year ahead.
You as well. Thank you. 🙂
I love that picture of all of you guys, and I think making resolutions for your boys is exactly the way to go. You don’t need any Resolutions. Why mess with perfection 🙂
It’s one of my favs! And yeah, why would i screw up all this perfect. hahah
Love this. Sending to my son and his wife who have 4 girls. (19, 7, 3, and 2) Son thinks he should probably start buying stock in feminine protection products. DIL is a saint. She also drinks a lot of wine. 🙂
Very sensible, I like the idea of making the resolutions for the “kids”…See what two scoops a day does, that is up there for thinking sweetie 😉
I think you are wise to stop now because as the kids get older suddenly they will say to you things like “you don’t need to tell me things I can see myself” or that is “obvious”. Duh!
ha! so being ignored is actually better. jeez! 😉
Oh I wanna print this and read it out loud to my kids and tape it in all of my son’s notebooks! 😀
I’m certain my own mother would have liked to have made resolutions for ME! I shudder to think what they’d be, though.
Ha!! Oh, mine would have definitely put on there to tweeze my eyebrows and match my clothes better!!
My kids asked me what my resolution was and I said not to kill them. My daughter looked at her brother and said, ‘I guess dad is ready to go to sleep.” Sometimes they prove they really do know us.
Great resolution! And funny kids!! Win win!
Send your sons to Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada and I’m sure they won’t wear shorts. Tonite it will be about -30 C and with the wind, it will be -40C. Their legs would freeze in 12 to 15 minutes.
Above all remember, that they know everything and should get good jobs now before they forget.
Ha! Maybe that’s the solution! Wow!! And yeah, that’s another great idea! We should lock up that confidence now before they get out into the crazy world. Thanks for reading! Stay warm!!
I just discovered your site today…Thank You!!!!! I have only read this one but plan to go back and read more. I feel like all I do is say: stop it, don’t do that, don’t touch that, don’t be mean to your brothers, ask them numerous times to do things, to be quiet, and stop arguing and fussing and being a tattletale. I just don’t get it and I know part of the reason I don’t get it is because I’m an only child…which is why we decided to have at least 2 and maybe 3 (depending on how the 2nd went) children. But low and behold we got 2 and 3 at the same time. God sure does have a sense of humor!!! I love them dearly and wouldn’t trade it, but I definitely didn’t know what I was getting myself into…lol…and mainly I just wish I could go to the bathroom in piece just once…
Thank you so much for reading! I’m so happy you found me! 3 is perfect!! Crazy but perfect!! 🙂